"But I don't want to go!"
David Wade sighed as he buttoned up his daughter's coat. "I know, sweetie. But your Mum asked specifically that you come and stay with her on Christmas."
Seeing the stricken look on his child's face, he gave her what he hoped was an encouraging smile. "Besides, it's just for tonight and part of tomorrow. When you come home, I'll have the house decorated all pretty for you and there will be lots of presents from Father Christmas waiting under the tree, just for you."
Her small face lit up at the mention of presents. David couldn't help grinning as he quickly added, "But you have to be good for Mummy."
She nodded vigorously. "Okay."
"All right then," he said as he draped the scarf around her neck and tugged her hood up. "Are you my little Cindyrella?"
She giggled and nodded.
"My little princess?"
She nodded again.
David grinned. "All right. Come here and give your old Dad a hug."
Lucinda Wade threw her arms around her father's neck and hugged him with all her small strength. David held his daughter tightly for several moments, before giving her a kiss and reluctantly letting her go. He looked up at the chauffeur who was patiently waiting at the door.
"Take good care of her, Daniel," he nodded to the young man.
"I always do, Mr. Wade."
Daniel held his hand out to the tiny girl who carefully took it. As the football-player sized chauffeur led the child out of the house, she turned and waved to her father.
David followed them to the door, watching as Daniel carefully helped the little girl into the sleek car. As he closed the door, David could barely see Cindy's head. Only her wide blue eyes, behind tendrils of dark hair were visible through the car window. The rest of her face was hidden by the car door.
She was so small. It had always startled David how small his daughter was, even for an 8-year-old.
She raised a mittened hand and waved to him again. He smiled and waved back to her. And he kept waving to her as the car pulled away from the curb and headed around the corner. Knowing she was still watching, he waved until she was out of sight.
David let his arm drop to his side as the car vanished and leaned back against the doorjamb. Christmas Eve without his daughter. The very thought hit him in the gut. But Meryl had been insistent. And as usual, the whole thing had escalated into an angry argument.
"You have her for every other day of the year. Why can't you give me this one day?"
"Are you even going to be around? You're barely around when she has her regular visits. She usually winds up going shopping or to the movies with Daniel, for heaven's sake. It's pretty sad when she has more fun with the chauffeur than her own mother."
"I don't have sole custody of her."
"You didn't even try to get JOINT custody of her!"
After much screaming and yelling, they finally agreed on a compromise. Meryl would take Cindy for Christmas Eve and part of Christmas Day. David would have her for the rest of Christmas Day and New Year's. Secretly, David thought he got the better end of the deal. He loved the thought of seeing in the new millenium with his daughter.
But Christmas Eve without his daughter still hurt.
A cold wind whipped down the street, causing David to shiver. Realizing he was standing in the open doorway, snow swirling around his feet, he quickly turned and stepped back into the house, closing the door behind him.
The sound of the slamming door echoed throughout the house, reminding just how empty the house really was. David sighed again.
The divorce had been two years ago. "Irreconcilable differences," had been the cause listed on the papers. Years of fights, anger, and screaming matches reduced to two words.
Irreconcilable differences.
David had surprised Meryl by not asking for any of her considerable money. His job as a reporter, as well as some savings, had ensured that he could easily take care of himself and his daughter. He had been more than willing to walk away from the whole thing with only what he'd walked in with. On one condition.
Joint custody of Lucinda.
Meryl had gone one better and had simply handed custody of Lucinda over to David. The day after the divorce papers had been signed and support payments had been arranged, she had shown up at David's door and turned the child over to him.
That had been painful for Cindy and David had lost count of the number of times he'd held his daughter as she cried to him, "Mommy doesn't want me. Mommy doesn't want me."
Meryl's visits slowly eased that pain, telling her she was not unwanted. But for the most part, David had been the one to pull his daughter through the whole tough business. It had been rough on both of them.
Now, suddenly Meryl wanted to spend time with Cindy. David began to wonder what the catch was.
Shaking his head, David headed for the living room to turn on some music while he wrapped his daughter's presents.
It was just too damn quiet in here.
Christmas, David mused, was good for keeping people busy. Presents, food, decorations, they all kept one occupied. Even better, they required a good deal of concentration. It was good way to keep his mind off the fact that he was alone.
But this would be a lot more enjoyable if Cindy were with him.
He was negotiating the corner of a gift with some wrapping paper when the timer in the kitchen went off. Dropping the roll of tape onto the box, he leaped to his feet and darted out into the kitchen.
Cindy loved Christmas cookies, which was why David was making extra batches. He sighed as he carefully slid the spatula beneath each one, moving it over to the sheet of wax paper and setting it down to cool. When they were cool enough, he'd put them away in an old cookie jar, and when Cindy finally came home, they could decorate them together. David sighed again.
Why did tomorrow seem so far away?
Well, as soon as he was done with everything, he'd go to bed. Maybe he wasn't waiting for Father Christmas, but he was waiting for someone special and spending time unconscious would make at least some of the night go faster. Let's see. Finish with the cookies, finish wrapping presents, decorate the house and the tree and he'd be finished. Then he'd be able to sleep.
Hopefully.
Setting the now empty cookie sheet into the sink, he futily brushed at the flour on his blue jeans. He had actually considered an apron while mixing together the cookie dough, but there were some lengths to which even he wouldn't go. He smiled at the thought.
Still rubbing at his jeans, he wandered back into the living room and plunked himself back down on the floor to finish wrapping presents.
Wrapping presents, he'd once discovered, required a good deal of patience, a decent visual acuity, and a vast imagination. And considering all the strange toys he'd had to wrap over the years, he'd become quite good at it.
He sighed again. He had never realized how much his thoughts always seemed to be returning to his daughter.
He missed her.
As he finished wrapping up the present in front of him, he wondered what she was doing. Probably having fun at some Christmas thing Meryl had taken her to. The Nutcracker or something like that, knowing Meryl. She always insisted that Cindy be exposed to culture, whatever that was.
That had been that last present to be wrapped. Setting it on to the pile of presents on the couch, he gathered up all the wrapping paper leftovers and scraps to either put them away or throw them out.
That accomplished, he turned his attention to the tree. It was actually a rather scrawny little thing, but Cindy had fallen in love with it when they had gone Christmas tree hunting. Probably because it was the perfect size for her to be able to hang many of the ornaments. Now he was going to be decorating it by himself.
Well, then he'd just have to make sure this was the best decorating job he'd ever done. And while he was at it, maybe he'd "forget" to hang a few of Cindy's favorite ornaments. He felt himself smile at the thought as he reached for the box that held the strings of Christmas .
David flopped down into the easy chair and surveyed his handiwork. Not a bad job, he mused. Granted, there were a few bare patches towards the bottom half of the tree, but he expected those to be filled tomorrow.
He sighed. His arms ached from holding them over his head for so long as he'd wound the lights, the garland, and the beads around the tree. Must be getting too old for this sort of work.
He sighed again as he rose to his feet. One more thing to do and that was to put away the cookies. Once that was done, he'd put his feet up, try and find a decent movie to watch on the telly, and either fall asleep in the chair or crawl to bed.
The old cookie jar had been a gift from his mother; a not so subtle hint that she wanted lots of grandchildren. David felt a small smile tug at his lips as he stared down at the jar. The gleeful face of Winnie the Pooh peered back up at him. Cindy loved Winnie the Pooh.
Quickly plunking the jar down, he lifted the top of the Pooh Bear's head off. Staring into the empty interior, he smiled to himself as he muttered, "A bear of very little brain, indeed."
Still smiling, he carefully picked up the cookies and gently deposited them inside the jar. All the cookies filled the jar to almost overflowing, which startled him. He hadn't realized he'd made so many. Well, at least he and Cindy would have a lot of fun with these. He should go and get some extra frosting in the morning.
He glanced at the clock on the wall as he headed back towards the living room. 10:00. Late. Quiet. The whole house was so quiet it felt oppressive. He nearly ran back to the living room to turn on some music again. He hated quiet. Well, all right, maybe he didn't exactly hate it. But he certainly wasn't used to it.
Stabbing at the Play button on the CD player, Vonda Shepard echoed throughout the house. Hardly any sort of Christmas music, but it gave him some comfort.
"My words are like confetti and you never pick them up," the lovely voice sang. "They fall to the ground, I need someone to lift me up."
Yeah, thought David as he turned the volume up. Sing it, Vonda.
How long he stood there, simply listening to the music, he wasn't sure. But it was the phone ringing that jarred him from his random thoughts.
A bolt of adrenaline rushed though him. Who was calling so late? Was it Meryl? Had something happened to Cindy? Hitting the Pause button, he darted over to the phone, scooping the receiver up. "Hullo?"
"Daddy?"
David's heart jumped into his throat at the sound of his daughter's tiny voice. "Cindy?" he asked urgently. "What's wrong? Where's Mummy?"
"She's at her party," she squeaked. "Daddy, can I come home?"
"Honey," David said gently. "Mummy specifically asked for you tonight. She'll spend time with you."
"But she's at her party," she said softly. "She doesn't want me around for that."
"Of course she does!" he said quickly. "Yes, she's probably a little busy with all of her guests, but she'll make time for you, sweetheart. I know she will."
The next sound David heard broke his heart as Cindy quietly began to cry. "I want to come home, Daddy."
"You will, honey. Tomorrow." He took a deep breath, steadying his voice. "Will my little Cindyrella be brave for me?"
He heard a small whimper emerge from her throat before she whispered, "Yes."
"Okay, honey," he whispered. "Now you go back to that party and have some fun, all right?"
"Yes, Daddy," she said quietly. But the tone of her voice was unconvincing; she sounded like she was about to cry again.
"I love you, Cindy," he murmured to her.
"I love you too, Daddy," she said softly.
"I'll see you tomorrow."
"Uh huh," was all she said as she hung up the phone.
David sighed as he dropped the phone back on to its cradle; a black weight settling in his chest. How could Meryl do that, leave Cindy all alone? She had sworn she wouldn't. Suddenly, alongside the black weight in his chest, he could feel anger starting to burn. Tomorrow, when Cindy was returned to him, he and Meryl were going to have a nice, long talk.
But for now, music was one thing that would make the remembered sound of Cindy's tears a little easier to bear.
He reached out and hit the Pause button on the CD player. Once again, Vonda Shepard's voice filled the air.
"I wear my heart like a wrinkle on my sleeve, And I've got this aching love that only you can relieve, But I'm not afraid to go down with a sinking friend, I'm gonna live out my dreams even if they kill me in the end."
Ah, Vonda, thought David. You are so right.
He occupied himself by arranging and rearranging the presents beneath the tree, making certain Cindy's stocking was overflowing with little gifts as it hung from a small, nearby shelf. And all the while, Vonda Shepard sang, the only comfort he had.
"It's you and me and you're no where to be found," she crooned into the silence of the house, the lyrics once again hitting way too close to his heart. He had put the CD player on infinite repeat. It would keep playing through the night, if he needed it to.
He was considering heading for bed when there was a pounding at the front door. Another bolt of adrenaline rushed through him.
Hurrying to the door, he peered through the ice encrusted, frosted glass and saw only a large, dark figure standing beneath the porch light, the glass and the ice obscuring any distinct features. He opened the door.
"Hullo?" he said to the figure on his porch.
"David Wade?"
"Who are you?"
He ignored the question. "Could I see some ID?"
"Who are you?" repeated David.
A new voice entered the exchange. "Daddy?"
David felt his eyes widen as he saw his child peek out from behind the man's legs.
"Cindy!" He stepped forward to pick up his daughter.
"Hold it, sir," said the figure and David suddenly realized he was looking at a policeman. "I need to see some ID."
"Yes," answered David as he pulled out his wallet. "Of course."
The officer studied his driver's license with careful scrutiny. To reassure him, David showed him another picture he kept with him of him and Cindy taken at some theme park. His daughter was laughing as she was hugged by an oversized teddy bear as David looked on, a wide grin on his face.
The officer seemed to consider this sufficient evidence that Cindy was indeed his daughter. He nodded to David, satisfied.
"What happened?" asked David.
"I found her wandering the streets not far from here," he said, glancing down at the shivering child. "She said she wanted to go home and she gave me your name and this address."
David suddenly felt like he had been hit in the chest. Tears sprang up in his eyes.
"This is her home, I take it," continued the officer.
"Yes," whispered David. He swallowed, momentarily pushing away the tears that choked him. "Yes, it is," he answered in a clear voice.
"What was she doing out at this time of night, sir?"
"She was visiting her mother." he answered quietly. "She said she wanted to come home, but I didn't listen."
He held out his hand to the officer, who shook it. "Thank you for bringing her home."
As the officer shook his hand, he peered at David, concerned. "Everything all right, sir?"
"Yes," David said quietly. "Thank you."
He held his hand out to his daughter who took it. With another nod to the officer who was turning to step back out to the street, David led her into the house.
Once inside, he knelt down in front of her and began to pull off her snow encrusted garments, hat, mittens, coat. All the while he found himself speaking urgently to her.
"What were you doing?! What were you thinking?!" he yelped at the small child. "What if something had happened? What if someone had grabbed you?"
With every harsh question, tears had slowly risen in Cindy's large blue eyes. But David was so wrapped in the torrent of emotions running through him; anger, relief, fear, that he barely noticed.
"Daddy," she whimpered. "I'm sorry."
It was the sorrow in her voice that stopped him. Once again, he felt his heart breaking. He knew he shouldn't be angry at her, all she'd wanted was to come home.
"Oh, honey," he whispered as he reached out and pulled her into his arms, hugging her tightly. "Oh, sweetheart. I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have yelled at you." He sighed. "It's just, you scared me. I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to you."
He felt his daughter's arms wrap around his neck, hugging him back. Carefully picking her up, he stood up and carried her towards the living room couch, stopping at the stereo to shut off the CD player. He had a feeling there was going to be more than enough noise in this house now.
"Are you hungry?" asked David as Cindy clung to his neck. "We could decorate some Christmas cookies."
"Yeah!" she cheered, her small body shivering with excitement. "Can we, Daddy?"
"Just a few," he answered with a smile, carrying her into the kitchen. "We'll want to save some for tomorrow."
Setting her down on one of the kitchen chairs, he turned and gathered up various decorating tools, frosting, sprinkles, knives, and set them down on the table. Then sitting down across from her, he grinned at her. "Let's decorate."
Cindy blinked at him. "Where are the cookies?"
"The cookies?" cried David. "Oh no! Where are the cookies?"
Cindy giggled.
"Where do you think the cookies are?" he asked.
Hopping down from the chair, she darted over to the counter and pointed up to the old cookie jar sitting there. "Pooh Bear!" she promptly declared.
David laughed. "That's right," he said as he rose to his feet and pulled the top of the jar off. "And just for being right, you get an extra cookie."
"Yay!" she giggled as he gathered up several cookies. Darting back over to the table, she scrambled up onto the chair and smiled happily as David set three cookies in front of her.
Immediately, she grabbed one of the knives and dunked it into a jar of pink frosting. David smiled to himself as he watched her smear the frosting onto the cookie, getting more of it on her hands than the cookie.
How he loved this little girl.
"Come on, Daddy!" she giggled up to him, waving the frosting laden butter knife at him. "Decorate!"
"Okay, Princess," grinned David as he picked up his knife. "Okay." .
"I think someone is getting sleepy."
"Am not," Cindy mumbled at him as she struggled to keep her eyes open.
"Well," said David as he washed up the last of the milk glasses. "Someone should be getting sleepy. I thought I heard bells jingling overhead not too long ago."
Cindy tired eyes widened momentarily. David smiled as he turned to her and held his arms out to her. "Come on, Cindyrella. Time for bed."
Amazingly, she didn't argue as he picked her up and carried her to her bedroom.
Setting her down on the pink bedspread, he tugged off her shoes and was starting to pull off her socks when she suddenly pushed his hands away. "I wanna do it."
He smiled. So now his daughter was asserting her independence. He could live with that. "All right," he answered, pulling a purple nightshirt out of the nearby dresser. "You get ready for bed and I'll go set out some milk and the cookies you decorated for Father Christmas."
She was already wriggling out of her Hunchback of Notre Dame shirt. "Okay," she said, her voice muffled beneath the cloth.
Still smiling to himself, David stepped out of her room and headed back towards the kitchen. But instead of reaching for the refrigerator, he reached for the phone and dialed a number he remembered all to well.
"Residence of Meryl Wade," answered a deep voice. David felt his eyebrows shoot up. She was keeping her married name?
"Charles," said David. "Is Meryl around?"
"Mr. Wade?" answered Meryl's personal assistant. "No, I'm afraid not. She's attending the guests at her Christmas party. Shall I get her for you?"
David sighed, frustrated. "No," he answered. "Don't bother. I'll talk to her tomorrow."
"All right, sir."
"Good night, Charles."
"Good night, sir."
As he hung up the phone, anger began to burn in David's chest again. Knowing Meryl, she probably wouldn't even notice that Cindy was gone until morning anyway. Oh yes, when she came here tomorrow, they were definitely going to have a nice, long talk.
But he wasn't going to waste his energy on being angry at Meryl. At least not now. Not when his daughter needed to be tucked in.
He almost laughed out loud when he walked back into her room and found her sitting on the edge of her bed, the purple nightshirt on backwards. But he choked the laughter down and simply smiled at her.
"Tuck me in, Daddy," she burbled to him.
His smile turned to a grin as he scooped her up in his arms and dumped her into the bed. She let out a shriek and laughed as he grabbed the covers and threw them over her, covering her completely. For several seconds, a lump scurried about beneath the covers as David plopped himself down on the edge of the bed. A moment later, the covers next to him flew back as Cindy suddenly popped out from beneath them, grinning up at her father and snuggling up with her pillow and Mr. Bows, a very large stuffed rabbit.
"Daddy?" she asked quietly.
"Yes?"
She hesitated, as if afraid to speak. So David slid his body off the edge of the bed and knelt next to it so they were on the same level and he could look into her eyes. "What is it, honey?"
"Does Mommy love me?" she whispered.
For a moment, David was so startled, he couldn't speak. Swallowing the lump that had suddenly risen in his throat, he reached out and stroked his daughter's dark hair.
"Of course, Mummy loves you," he said gently. He took a deep breath. "She's just not very good at showing it."
"How come?"
He sighed. "I don't know. I thought I did, but I guess not." He smiled tenderly at her. "But I know she loves you more than anything in the world."
His answer seemed to satisfy her and she smiled at him as she snuggled a little closer to Mr. Bows. Leaning forward, he softly kissed her and he felt one small arm come up to wrap around his neck in an awkward hug. He hugged her back.
"I love you, my little Cindyrella," he whispered to her.
"I love you too, Daddy," she whispered back.
"Now you get to sleep," he whispered to her. "Or Father Christmas is going to pass our house by."
"Okay."
He straightened up and gazed down at his child as she closed her eyes. After a few moments, he turned and slipped out of the room, pulling the door closed behind him.
Oh yes, he thought as he turned to head to his own room and gather up all the presents that were hidden there. Meryl and I are definitely going to have a nice, long talk.
"DAAAAAADDDDDYYYYYYY!"
The joyous squeal came in and shattered the deep sleep that held David in its protective embrace. A moment later, he felt something child-heavy drop next to him onto the bed. Immediately, there was a bit of scrambling and a small pair of arms wrapped around his neck, nearly strangling him.
"DaddyDaddyDaddyDaddy!" Cindy sang in his ear. "Presentspresentspresents!"
"Gaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!" groaned David as he somehow managed to disentangle his daughter from around his neck and turn his attention to the bedside clock. 5:45 am. He groaned again.
"Oh Cindy," he sighed. "Can't we wait another hour? Daddy can barely move."
"Nooooooo!" wailed Cindy, flinging her arms around David's neck again, causing him to yelp. "Please Daddy, I wanna open presents now!"
David sighed. Where the hell did someone so small get so much energy?
"All right," he groaned. "I'll get up." He sat up in the bed and glowered at his child. "But no presents are to be opened until Daddy gets some caffeine in his system."
Cindy's wide smile fell. David decided he would drink his coffee quickly.
Dragging himself out of bed and shuffling towards the door, he caught a glimpse of himself in the closet mirror and let out a small groan. Rumpled light blue pajamas clung to his body and he looked like death warmed over. Here was definite proof that David Wade was not a morning person.
He heard Cindy trotting after him as he headed down the hall towards the living room to shuffle into the kitchen. Thankfully, the night before, he'd had sense enough to figure that Cindy would be rousting him out of bed early this morning and had set the coffeemaker's timer to an early hour. The earthy, caffeine-laced, acidic scent filled the air and David felt himself waking up as he stepped into the kitchen.
Reaching for his favorite mug, he also pulled a small Bugs Bunny glass from the cabinet. After filling his mug with coffee and savoring a long swallow, he pulled a jar of apple juice from the refrigerator and filled the Bugs Bunny glass with the golden liquid. Cindy needed no prompting as he set the glass on the edge of the table. She scrambled up on to her chair, carefully picked up the glass and began to drink.
David smiled to himself as he settled down at the table and watched Cindy's posture; elbows on the table, hunched forward, hands wrapped around the glass as she sipped the liquid inside, an exact imitation of his own posture. He smiled at her and she smiled back.
Amazingly, he was the one that finished first and he silently, patiently waited for Cindy to finish her apple juice.
Finally, plunking down her glass, Cindy hopped off her chair as David stood up and took her hand. Without a word, they headed into the living room.
Almost immediately, Cindy was attacking the pile of presents beneath the tree.
"Hey! Hey!" laughed David as he scooped her up. "Slow down a little there, Cindyrella! Those presents aren't going anywhere."
"Daddy!" she howled as she squirmed in his grasp. David laughed again and set her back down. A moment later, she was tearing through the presents again, piling up all the ones that had her name on them and setting aside the ones that went to anyone else.
David settled himself down on the sofa and couldn't help grinning as he watched her tear open her presents, hearing her crows of joy as she saw what was inside each one.
"Thank you, Daddy!" she squealed at each toy and doll and game that was revealed.
"Don't thank me," he finally said when the last present was opened. "Thank Father Christmas. He knows you've been a good girl this year."
Cindy smiled happily then suddenly peered at him, perplexed.
"Don't you get any presents, Daddy?"
For a moment, David was flustered by the question. Then he smiled at her. "Well, I didn't ask for anything, sweetheart. So Father Christmas didn't know what to get for me."
She hopped to her feet. "Well, I got something for you, Daddy," she said proudly before darting out of the room.
David gazed after her, completely mystified. A few moments later, she came running back in clutching her little backpack. And he watched in amazement as she pulled out a small, brightly wrapped box and held it out to him. "Merry Christmas, Daddy."
Stunned, David stared at her and the box she held out. "Cindy--!" he whispered, his voice catching as a lump rose in his throat. Quickly swallowing and letting a delighted smile cross his face, he took the box from her. "Thank you!"
"Open it!" she giggled.
Grinning, David instead bent down and scooped his daughter up in his arms. Then, sitting back on the sofa, he settled her in his lap. She giggled and leaned back against him, his arms surrounding her as he held the gift in front of her.
"Now what do we have here?" he asked as he examined the box. He held it up to his ear and carefully shook it. "Hmmm. Doesn't make any noise." He peered at her curiously. "Is it a puppy?"
She giggled. "No."
"How about a new computer?"
"No."
"A swing set?"
"No!" cried Cindy. "Open it, Daddy!"
David laughed. "All right, Princess," he answered as he tugged off the green bow that was stuck to the box. With a grin, he plopped it on top of Cindy's head, where it stuck to her hair. She giggled again as he began to tear the paper from the box.
The white cardboard box was taped shut and it took him a few moments to wrestle the tape off. Finally opening the box, he began to pull out lots of crumpled paper. Cindy helped by taking each ball of paper and throwing it across the room into the mess of wrapping paper she'd left from her attack on the presents.
Still laughing, David finally reached into the box and pulled out what was buried beneath all the paper. His laughter was quickly silenced.
He pulled out a tiny water globe. Attached to a small wooden stand, the globe itself couldn't have been more than two inches wide. Inside the globe was a tiny, finely detailed castle. Giving the globe a shake, shiny swirls of glitter whirled around the castle, bathing it in a lovely light. David shook his head in amazement.
Cindy pointed at the globe. "A beautiful princess lives there."
David nodded. "Oh yes," he said softly as he hugged her tightly. "But I'll bet she's not as beautiful as my little princess."
She giggled again as he kissed her. "Thank you, Cindyrella," he whispered to her.
Giving her another hug, he grinned at her. "Why don't you get dressed? Then we'll get ready to go to Grandma's."
"Yay!" she squealed as she hopped off his lap and darted to her room. David smiled to himself as he stepped over to his own room.
Setting the tiny water globe onto his dresser, he felt his smile widen. In many ways, he would call this a successful Christmas. Turning back to his closet, he pulled out a pair of jeans and a shirt which he quickly threw on. Thankfully, Mom was never too concerned with appearances, something that had always made Meryl uneasy when it came to his family.
Tying his shoes, he sighed, his smile fading. Through the night, his anger at Meryl had faded and now he found he was just feeling a profound sense of disappointment. He was hoping Meryl had changed just a bit, enough that she would spend more time with her own daughter. He sighed again. Maybe people never changed.
Stepping out of his room again, he went over and tapped on Cindy's bedroom door. "Almost ready?" he called.
There were several loud thumps from inside, as if she was hopping around with considerable force. "Almost ready!" she called out to him.
Grinning and shaking his head to himself, David headed for the kitchen.
He was getting ready to pour himself another cup of coffee when the doorbell rang. Who would be showing up on Christmas Day? And at 7:15 in the morning?
Heading for the door, he peered at the small, slender figure barely visible through the frosted glass. He recognized the figure all too well and he found himself frowning.
Opening the door, the worried eyes of Meryl Wade stared up at him.
She opened her mouth as if to say something, but David cut her off before she got the chance to speak. "She's here."
Meryl's body sagged with relief. A moment later, she straightened up. "May I come in?"
Without a word, David stepped back, allowing her to step inside.
"I'm firing Daniel tomorrow," she said without preamble.
David frowned. "Why?" he asked, thinking of the bulky chauffeur who cared for Cindy like he would a little sister.
"Didn't he bring her here?" she asked coldly. "And of course, you didn't order him to take her back. When you knew I would be worried sick about her."
"For one thing," snapped David. "You were too busy with your party guests to even notice she was gone. When did you find out she was missing, Meryl? I'm guessing about 45 minutes ago."
"Don't tell me how to care for my child--!"
"For another thing, Daniel didn't bring her here."
"Well then, who did?"
"No one," he said flatly. "She walked."
"What?!"
David took a deep breath, hoping to calm himself. "She walked, Meryl," he said. "She called me up and begged me to come home. But I knew you had asked for Christmas Eve and I told her she should stay at your house, that you would find some time to spend with her." He struggled to keep his voice steady. "An hour later, a cop shows up on my doorstep with my daughter, telling me he found her wandering the streets, saying she wanted to come home. I guess he thought it a bit odd that an eight year old girl would be wandering the streets at eleven o'clock at night."
"And you didn't think to call me?" she whispered.
"I did call," he said coldly. "You were busy tending to your party guests. And I certainly wouldn't want to disturb you in that."
It was at that moment, Meryl did the last thing he expected. She burst into tears.
Immediately, David was hit with a wave of guilt. "Meryl," he said softly. "I--."
"Don't tell me you're sorry," she whispered. "Because you shouldn't be. I deserved every bit of that."
She silently turned away from him towards the counter, reaching out to grip its edge in her hands. David watched, startled, as her hands gripped it so hard her knuckles turned white. Her shoulders silently began to shake.
"Mommy?"
Both of them turned at the sound of their child's voice. Standing in the doorway, Cindy peered at them both, her eyes widening at the sight of her mother's tears.
"Mommy?" she asked again, as she darted over to her mother. Silently, Meryl knelt down and cautiously put her arms around Cindy. Immediately, the little girl wrapped her arms around her neck, hugging her tightly. "Please don't cry, Mommy."
Immediately, Meryl's arms tightened around her as her body shook with tears. "I'm sorry," David heard her whisper. "Oh God, honey. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have left you alone last night. I'm so sorry."
"It's okay, Mommy," Cindy said softly. "Daddy took good care of me." She pulled back and peered into her mother's tear-stained face. "We decorated cookies."
In spite of her tears, Meryl let out a soft laugh. "Daddy always takes such good care you," she whispered.
David blinked, startled by the tone of her voice. Stepping forward, he gently touched Cindy's shoulder, drawing her away from her mother.
"Can you do me a favor, Princess?" he asked gently.
Cindy nodded.
"Can you go into the living room and pick all the wrapping paper for me?" he said softly. "Make sure the floor is good and clean, okay?"
Cindy peered at Meryl, who nodded to her.
"Okay," answered Cindy and reluctantly turned away to trot back into the living room.
David watched her go before saying quietly, "Meryl, what's going on?"
For several moments, she didn't move. Then slowly standing up, she turned and stared up into his face. She folded her arms around her body, as if protecting herself from something. "Can we sit down for a minute?"
"Of course," he murmured, stepping over to the kitchen table and pulling out a chair for her. As she sat down, David carefully set himself down in a chair across from her.
For several long moments, Meryl remained silent, staring down at her hands on the table, avoiding his eyes. David waited.
Finally, Meryl spoke.
"I went to the doctor last week for my annual exam," she said softly. He watched as she visibly swallowed. "And during the exam, she found a lump in my breast."
David felt the color drain from his face.
"They did a biopsy to find out whether or not it was cancer."
"What did they find out?" he asked.
"I don't know," she said softly. "I won't find out until tomorrow."
David stared at her. "How long have you been waiting?"
"Since last week," she whispered.
David's eyes widened as he stared into Meryl's elfin face. "Why didn't you call me?!" he yelped. He reached across the table and took her hand as words began to pour out of him. "Meryl, no one should ever have to play that waiting game alone. No one." He sighed as he held her hand in both of his. "Look, we may not be husband and wife anymore. But I'd like to think we're still friends; that you can still pick up a phone and call me with something like this."
Her fingers suddenly wrapped around his, clutching his hand tightly. "We are friends, David," she murmured. "Even with all those idiots that showed up at my party last night. I know none of them would ever want to be with me while I had to wait through this." Her eyes left his to stare down at their clenched hands. "Sometimes, it seems like you're my only friend in the world."
"Even with all the fighting?" he asked softly.
"Even with all the fighting," she confirmed. "Because you're the one person in this world that I trust." She shook her head. "But what about Cindy?"
"What do you mean?"
She sighed. "If I had told you what was going on, you would have worried and fretted and she would have sensed something was wrong. Knowing her natural curiosity, she would have asked you about it. And I know you, David," she whispered as she shook her head at him. "You can't lie to her. Even if it's for her own good."
David remained silent, knowing she was right.
He heard Meryl take a deep, shuddering breath. "Oh God, how am I going to tell her?" Tears sprang up in her eyes. "That's why I left her alone last night. I couldn't face her. I couldn't stand the thought of having to tell her that I'm sick."
"You don't know that," he said quickly.
"David," she said softly. "My mother died from cancer. That makes my chances a lot higher. You know that."
"I can hope," he said softly as he squeezed her hand. A moment later, he blinked as a sudden realization hit him. "This is why you were so insistent on having Cindy for Christmas Eve, isn't it? So you could tell her."
"No," she answered. "I just wanted to spend some time with my daughter." Tears slowly began to course down her face. "If I'm sick," she whispered. "If I'm going to die, I don't want my daughter to remember me as some cold stranger." A sob escaped her. "But then, I've really messed that up, haven't I?"
Immediately, David stood up and pulled his chair around the table to sit next to her. Gently slipping an arm around her shoulders, his voice was a gentle whisper. "Cindy loves you. Believe that. If you believe nothing else, believe that."
"I'm scared, David," she whispered. "God above, I am so scared."
"I know, Meryl," he murmured, his arm tightening around her. "I'm scared too." He sighed as a sudden feeling of determination rose up in him. "But we'll beat this," he whispered. "Whatever it is, no matter what it takes, we'll beat this."
Meryl pulled back to look up into his eyes and smiled gratefully at him. "Thank you," she whispered.
David gave her a hopeful smile as he gazed into her eyes. No matter how many fights they got into, no matter how many screaming matches there were, there some things that just couldn't be changed. One was the fact that this woman was the mother of his child. She was also his friend and in spite of the past, he still cared for her. And somehow, instinctively, he knew she still cared for him.
"I suppose," he said softly. "This is the moment where we gaze into each other's eyes, suddenly realize we're still deeply in love, and start to kiss like there's no tomorrow."
An amused smile tugged at Meryl's lips, but it quickly faded. "I'm afraid that's not going to happen, David," she said quietly.
"I know," he whispered. "And that's quite all right with me."
They sat in a pleasant silence for several moments before Meryl finally whispered, "So what now?"
"Now," answered David as he released his gentle grip on her shoulders. "We go to my mother's for Christmas."
"Oh," she murmured. "Maybe I should go home then."
"Now why would you do a thing like that?"
Meryl stared at him, startled. "David, I can hardly show up at your mother's house like nothing is wrong."
"Why not?" he asked, genuinely surprised. "Everyone still considers you part of the family. Mum adores you, she keeps asking about you."
"Your Mum thinks I need fattening up." she smiled.
"True. But that's only because she cares," he smiled. "Come on, Meryl," he said gently. "I know they'd all love to see you again." He shook his head. "And no one should spend Christmas alone. Besides, it might get your mind off this waiting game you're playing, at least for a few hours."
Meryl peered skeptically at him.
"Besides," David continued. "I know Cindy would love for you to be there."
That seemed to make the decision for her. She nodded. "All right. I'll go."
David felt a wide smile cross his face. Turning back to the living room, he called out, "Cindy? Ready to go?"
As if by magic, his daughter was standing in front of him. "Ready, Daddy."
"Mummy is coming with us to Grandma's. Is that okay with you?"
Cindy's eyes widened as she gave a squeal of joy. Darting over to her mother, she threw her arms around Meryl's neck.
"I'll take that as a 'Yes,'" murmured David.
He watched as Meryl hugged their little girl tightly. After a moment, Cindy pulled away from her to peer into her face. "You didn't get your Christmas present, Mommy."
In a moment, Cindy was running back towards the living room and just as quickly, she came running back with her little backpack, her hands diving into it as she rushed over to her mother again.
Another brightly wrapped package was pulled out and she held it out to her. "Merry Christmas, Mommy."
Meryl's eyes widened as she took the present from Cindy. She stared at it in her hands for several moments.
"I didn't get you anything," she whispered to the little girl.
"Yes, you did," she answered, confused.
Meryl glanced up at David. He silently nodded to her.
"Yes," she whispered with a grateful smile to him. "I did."
David smiled to himself as he watched Cindy help Meryl open her gift. And for a brief moment, everything was forgotten. The divorce, the arguments, the anguish Cindy had gone through thinking her mother didn't want her, the waiting game Meryl was playing with her life. For one shining moment, David was pulled back in time and he was watching his family as it was.
No, he quickly realized. That wasn't it. He wasn't watching his family as it was. He was watching his family as it would be. A few things may have changed. A few ties may be broken and this family would never be the way it was. But he and Meryl were father and mother to this little girl. And that was one thing that would never change.
Thank goodness.